I Stand Corrected, pointless comedy for an update.

Okay, so sci-fi/action author Michael Z. Williamson (aka, "Mad Man Mike") came up with the great hashtag #IStandCorrected to make.. some utterly hilarious and completely inappropriate puns.  And here's my contributions - 

The most effective wizard spell is not "Ecksellvee Parabellum Hollowpointius" ‪#IStandCorrected

Contrapposto is not a militant noodle. ‪#IStandCorrected

"Haunted Attraction" doesn't imply an awkward sexual relationship with a ghost. ‪#IStandCorrected

The Hybernian Society is not in continuous war with Thulsa Doom and his Serpent Men. ‪#IStandCorrected

A meat freezer and a wood chipper are not appropriate wedding gifts. ‪#IStandCorrected

Vincent Price never starred in a porno titled, "The Abominable Dr. Vibes" #IStandCorrected

"TagaloNg" is not a language spoken by Filipino Girl Scouts. #IStandCorrected

"Battered Women" is neither a new foodstuff available at the State Fair, nor a kink involving Pancakes. #IStandCorrected

The #IceBucketChallenge is not about supporting Guantanamo Bay. #IStandCorrected

American students are not going to be taught Cockney English as part of the Common Cor, Blimey! Standards. #IStandCorrected

The most important political office in Japan is not: "Student Council President". #IStandCorrected

Tyler Perry is not responsible for a series of movies starring Medusa. #IStandCorrected

eLixir is not my one-stop online shop for all my patent medicine needs. #IStandCorrected

"MRAs" are not plastic wrapped meals for soldiers. #IStandCorrected

Having summer allergies doesn't mean I'm being oppressed by the Haytriarchy. #IStandCorrected

A person with a Screw Loose is not helped by giving them a shot of vodka in orange juice. #Mixology #IStandCorrected

An apron reading "Kiss the Cook" does not mean Gene Simmons is making me dinner. #IStandCorrected

"Of Human Bondage" stars Bette Davis, not Bettie Page. #IStandCorrected

When a woman complains, "Chivalry is dead.", she's not hinting for me to light her thatched roof on fire, steal her livestock and throw a dead animal down her well. #IStandCorrected

"Purity Balls" are not Wiccan cleansing amulets given as housewarming gifts. #IStandCorrected

The song "Peggy Sue" was not an ode to a girl with an intimidating habit involving "Marital Aids". #IStandCorrected

Heretics who did not believe in the doctrine of transubstantiation were not executed in a LollardPalooza. #IStandCorrected

"Turkish Delight" does not refer to how much fun their prison guards get to have. #IStandCorrected

An"MS relationship" does not imply you're dating a girl from Mississipi. #IStandCorrected

Special Forces don't cover their faces with a Baklava no matter how sweet a mission it is #IStandCorrected

#BeerCanChicken is not archaic gay slang for a minor who wants alcohol #IStandCorrected

Spike Lee is not a Hong Kong action director. #IStandCorrected

There is no party toy store named LMFAO Schwartz. #IStandCorrected

"The Road to Serfdom" is not a set of directions to the beach" #IStandCorrected

The "Big Johnson" line of t-shirts do not celebrate an English Playwright. #IStandCorrected

A Friend who shaves their head when you're undergoing cancer treatment is not a Chemo Sabe. #IStandCorrected